is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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