Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
two words...techno handjob
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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