No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
