sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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