Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
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