I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
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