Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Randomize
