I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
You know, be my cock's hype man.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
