bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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