I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
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