I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
