Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
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