You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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