My brain says no but my pants say off.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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