do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
