He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
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