There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize