love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"