No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
My bed smells like the plague
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