This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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