It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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