Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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