This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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