My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
