i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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