I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Randomize
