i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
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I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
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It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Randomize