If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
