Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
