I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
