It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
