She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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