Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
