I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
