if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
where are my pants?
in the oven.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
