hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
