Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
