legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize