I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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