they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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