Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.