Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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