The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Holy sore nipples Batman
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
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