I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize