im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
why is half of my head shaved?
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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