I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
