That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize
