Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
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