i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
