Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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