is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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